<center><h1>The Sale You Have to Close</h1></center> People assume sales is about persuasion. That good sales is about pulling the wool over a customers eyes. Fancy suits. High pressure tactics. A game of manipulation. That reputation has changed how people buy. They walk into the process guarded, skeptical. Trust is low by default — and every seller starts at arm's length. I’ve worked in sales for six years, closing over $10 million in deals. I now sell to some of the largest companies in the world. But only recently did I realize something strange: The conversations I have with buyers; the hesitations, the objections, the emotional math, are the same ones we all have with ourselves when it comes time to take action. ## Feature Selling and De-Risking Decisions You can tell when people have purchased software before. They come to meetings prepared. They know what they can spend, the problems they're facing, what happens if they don't solve them, the effort and people involved, and if you're lucky they'll have a clear timeline. We don't think about it this way, but buying is a real skill! It's rare you'll get all of these and more often than not you won't get any of them. I might hop on a call with someone who's been told they need to buy a new tool. It's now part of their job description to make a purchase decision and implement it. They only have a vague idea of what they need and a rough outline of who will be involved in the process. It's my job to help them answer those questions. It's how we know people are serious about making a purchase. Sure sometimes people will buy for very little reason at all. It's word of mouth or their job is on the line. Maybe they already have another job lined up and don't really care what happens to the company after the fact. You've been in this position too! The check out stand at the grocery store always has a sweet treat you weren't even thinking about, but just the proximity to it is enough to make a decision happen. In software sales, this often means selling by features. You get a checklist from a customer. Your product must democratize data, it needs to be easy to use, quick to set up, and not too expensive. A good seller will ask for some hard requirements, but bad buyers won't have them. Once you've satisfied the checklist a good seller will take things a step further. They'll describe **how** they're going to meet these requirements. Buyers don't just want a solution, they want to feel safe in their decisions. A bad purchase might put their job on the line after all. You'll rarely hear that from a customer. They keep their values tied to the business rather than their personal objectives, but good sellers know that any purchase can be tied back to a buyers identity. ## Value is Subjective What people *say* they want and what they actually value can vary wildly. Selling is part strategy, part psychology. To close well, you have to understand not just what people *need*, but how they see themselves. An effective sales process will speak to the the layered needs of an individuals identity ### Identity Layers - Relational - How does this affect my team and organization? - User-Centered - Will this make life better for myself and the people I work with? - Professional - Does this represent my profession and the work I strive to do? - Personal - Does this help me win at work? - Ego - Will I look competent if I make this decision? When I first started selling, my company had a clear line of sight on the individuals they wanted to target. Our message was tightly coupled with the identities a budding field of data professionals. As our company and clout grew, it became clear that purchasing our tool was the right choice for the personal and the ego as well. Great sales isn't about persuading someone to change their identity - it's showing them that our product already aligns with who they are. But this is where the assumed identity of sales people comes into play. If you can tell a buyer you align with their values and you're convincing enough, you can skip over a critical part of the buying process; building trust. ## Trust Accelerates All Deals It's a common refrain among sellers, "Your prospect needs to see you as a trust advisor, not someone with a quota to hit." People buy when they trust the seller, product, and process (which includes themselves executing). When these feel shaky the deal stalls. Earlier I mentioned that new buyers often don't know how to buy a product. At first they don't know what they don't know and this makes them confident. As they continue going through the process they start to realize their task is much larger than it seemed. Their internal company forces are pulling them in one direction, their identity in another, and the product and seller in a third. To align all three sellers need to build up their relationship with the customer, establish a rapport, and create a trusting environment. Some do this through dinner, drinks, and schmoozing. Others help a prospect define their goals and establish a clear path to reaching them. Whatever path they choose, the sale itself hinges on trust. The way we treat our own lives is very similar. If you don't trust yourself to follow-through, if the process is too murky, the outcomes undefined, you're likely to not take action at all. ## Selling to Yourself When we set goals for ourselves we're effectively making a purchase against the future. > We sell time to buy an outcome. Every meaningful action you take (or avoid) goes through the same value filter: - Is this worth it? - Is this aligned with who I am or who I want to be? - Do I trust myself to follow through? But more likely than not you can't answer any of these questions. You are both an inexperienced buyer and a lousy salesman. Your goals look like features on a spec sheet. They’re bland, abstract, and disconnected from who you want to become. The most important thing you can do is understand who you want to become and why. Your surface level goals are tied to something deeper. We don't share these deeper truths with other people - the fact we want to be desired, or we're not confident in ourselves, that we're meant for more. Having these conversations with yourself can be difficult. Your brain is purpose-built to limit what you achieve. It doesn't like when you take risks. It wants comfort. But there is a way out. You need to build trust. Just like the best salesmen in the world do with their prospects. ## The Real Work: Build Internal Trust There are three critical steps to this process. ### **Tie action to your superordinate goals (identity-based outcomes).** An identity-based outcome is not just a goal. It goes far beyond that. You do not want to lose weight. You want to become a person who cares for their body. You want to spend as long as you can on this planet. You want to see your children grow up. You want people to admire your looks. To uncover these truths you need to ask yourself *why* you're pursuing your goals. You can do this in a journal, talk to a trusted friend or therapist, or even chat with an AI. At this point I prefer the latter. It's easy to have a conversation in private about these things than just journal, but each of us have our own flows. ### **Reduce the perceived risk by shrinking the next step.** Our superordinate goals are easier to chunk into smaller steps. Imagine writing your ideal self on the top of the page with a number of branches leading downward making up actions you can take up in the short and medium term. This process takes time but makes it clear what steps you'll need to work toward along the way to your ideal self. Again, I think AI is particularly good at this process. I have an example conversation and prompt shared in this [link with ChatGPT](https://chatgpt.com/share/67f95472-b418-800c-b874-2f65334e23c3) Normally I'd continue the conversation after this to try refine what matters to me or taking the output and doing that work on my own. ### **Build a track record of follow-through—your personal proof loop.** As you work toward your subordinate goals you need to track that progress, at the very least mentally. When you build a record of success you increase your self-efficacy and start to develop an internal locus of control. Both of which have positive associations with goal attainment and hard work. ## The Most Important Sale You’ll Ever Make In sales and in life, the features are secondary. The real question is: _Does this align with who I am and who I’m becoming?_ Selling taught me this: value is never handed to anyone. It’s revealed, reinforced, and made personal. When we set goals for ourselves we need to do the same thing every step of the way. It's how we ensure we don't give up when things get tough, because they will. Becoming your ideal self takes time, effort, and energy. When you're struggling to take action, ask yourself: > If someone tried to sell me this version of me, would I buy it? You’ve got to sell yourself on your vision — every damn day.